Testimony

 'I thank Christ Jesus our Lord, who has given me strength, that he considered me trustworthy, appointing me to his service. Even though I was once a blasphemer and a persecutor and a violent man, I was shown mercy because I acted in ignorance and unbelief. The grace of our Lord was poured out on me abundantly, along with the faith and love that are in Christ Jesus. Here is a trustworthy saying that deserves full acceptance: Christ Jesus came into the world to save sinners—of whom I am the worst. But for that very reason I was shown mercy so that in me, the worst of sinners, Christ Jesus might display his immense patience as an example for those who would believe in him and receive eternal life. Now to the King eternal, immortal, invisible, the only God, be honour and glory for ever and ever. Amen. '

1 Timothy 1:12-17

https://www.bible.com/bible/111/1TI.1.12-17

Here is the Apostle Paul summing up his testimony of faith in Christ Jesus to his mentee, Timothy. Paul didn't blow his own trumpet, like so many self proclaimed 'apostles' nowadays. If there's hope for Saul of Tarsus, there's hope even for me.

Saul was a blasphemer. He insulted the Lord Jesus and persecuted Him by hounding His people to death. If Saul was around nowadays he'd be the kind of person that's a member of Hamas.

Humanly speaking, we might assume that there would be no hope for a terrorist. Yet even one of the sons of one of the founders of Hamas has become a believer in the Lord Jesus (and lives in America to avoid getting martyred by Hamas). God is able to show mercy to the worst of sinners.

Amazingly, God considered treacherous, murderous Saul trustworthy. He acted in ignorance and unbelief. So God had mercy upon him, He didn't treat him as his sins deserved.

God can turn anyone's life around. If a terrorist was to repent of their sins and trust in Jesus, they could become one of His servants, like Paul was.

Paul believed himself to be the worst of sinners, although I could give him a run for his money. Paul could honestly say he acted in ignorance and unbelief. I'm not sure I can say that of myself. 

I was brought up in a Christian home. I knew the good news of salvation for all who believe in the Lord Jesus Christ. I even professed faith in Jesus as an eight year old. I wasn't a terrorist boy, or a murderer; but I knew I was a proud, religious hypocrite. 

I had assumed that because my parents were Christians and we went to church and I knew the answers at Sunday School, that I was a Christian.

Then my lovely grandad, who used to teach us evolution on his knee, became a deathbed convert to Jesus. He knew that he was about to meet his Maker, and he knew that he, lovely and moral and fine and upstanding though he was, was a sinner before a holy God. My mum, auntie and grandma were Christians, so they encouraged him to cry out to Jesus for salvation. 

He did, and I saw in my family peace, hope and joy in the face of impending death. Subconsciously really, I knew that if he needed Jesus, I certainly did.

On September 24th 1996 (a few days after he went to be with his Saviour), mum was talking with my five year old sister about Jesus. My sister wandered off, and I simply said to mum, 'how can I be saved?' (even though I will have heard at church and home loads of times). She quoted a verse from the Bible to me: 'If we confess our sins, God is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness'. I prayed to God to forgive me of my sins because of Jesus's death for me. 

Then, with tears of joy and relief, I asked mum, 'is that it?' but I knew it was it in terms of my salvation. There was no flash of lighting, roll of thunder, or voice from above, but I felt the peace of God despite our grief at losing grandad. 

Is that it? Well in terms of salvation I trust I got saved then, but clearly a lot of water has passed under the bridge since them. I've become like the man in the Corinthan church in the sense that even as a professing Christian, he sinned in a way that even pagans don't tolerate, and got kicked out of the church. Yet there is a strong suggestion in 2 Corinthians that he genuinely repented and was eventually welcomed back into the fellowship of believers.

God doesn't want anyone to perish. He didn't want Saul to be condemned to hell as he deserved, and He doesn't want me to be condemned to hell as I deserve.

Why did God save the Apostle Paul? By his own admission, so that He could showcase His patience with even the worst of sinners. Why do I hope that God has truly saved me? So that in my repentant, transformed life, fellow sinners can see that there is hope for them too to be saved, forgiven, transformed and to become blessings instead of curses.

Paul wasn't blowing his own trumpet. He knew he hadn't earnt God's acceptance, quite the opposite. He knew it was thanks to Christ crucified on His behalf. I'm trusting in Christ crucified on my behalf too. I was a hypocrite, immoral and arrogant, but I trust God has had mercy upon me and will restore me to Himself.

When Jesus died, two criminals were crucified besides Him. At first, they both insulted Him for claiming to be the Saviour when He didn't even save Himself. Eventually, one of them told the other off. He realised that them two were getting what they deserved, but that Jesus wasn't. Then he simply asked Jesus, 'Lord, remember me when You come into Your Kingdom' and Jesus replied, 'Today, you will be with me in paradise'.